Updated: Mar 9
Any abuse or trauma, how ever it has occurred, can impact your sex life. It is not unusual for past trauma to impact you psychologically without realising. However, some women are aware of what is causing their trauma and many will suspect that they know the cause. The whole time your body is stuck with a trauma, you will be suffering that trauma either via physical symptoms, psychological symptoms or a combination of both.
The trauma doesn’t have to be the obvious ones of sexual abuse or another trauma that manifests as sexual problems. Difficult childbirth, physical health problems and body changes are just as likely to trigger the trauma that leads to sexual problems. Examples include women who experience surgical procedures in or close to their sexual organs or mothers who have an episiotomy during childbirth. They may subconsciously hold that trauma for years to come making them susceptible to sexual problems.
The good news is that working on the subconscious mind can help, whatever the circumstances or how the trauma manifests.
A client I recently treated, let’s call her Lisa, has a four-year-old child she adores. She came to me because she knows she’d rather spend time with her daughter than have sex with her partner. Their sex life returned and she said it was okay, but not quite as good as before, but they put that down to having a child in the home. Lately, she realised that her reluctance to have sex was increasing and she was starting to notice pain during penetration.
I worked with her and discovered that she was still traumatised from childbirth. It was something that had returned to cause her problems.
The birth was supposed to be natural, but after six hours in labour and the baby in bottom first position, Lisa described the pain as unbearable. She asked for pain relief but was told it was too late; the birth was too far advanced. So she endured the pain of a complicated breech birth without pain relief, which included an episiotomy and the subsequent stitches.
Although she physically healed well and they returned to a sex life, Lisa had not realised the difficult birth’s traumatic impact on her.
By having solution focussed hypnotherapy sessions, we worked with the subconscious mind. Lisa is a now enjoying more frequent and a fulfilling and pain-free sex life. This is just one example of how working on the subconscious mind can help women to overcome sexual trauma, even when they don’t know they have trauma.