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Writer's pictureHypnotherapy DeBono

When It Flops: Women's Wisdom for Erection Woes

Updated: Apr 11

About the Fun, We're Supposed to be Having!


Hey there, lovely ladies! Let's dive into a topic that might not be the most glamorous but is definitely important: erectile dysfunction (ED). Yep, it happens to the best of us, doesn't it? One moment, everything's steamy and sizzling, and the next, that magnificent erection decides to take a vacation, leaving you both feeling a bit flustered and perplexed.


Yep, it happens to the best of us, doesn't it? One moment, everything's steamy and sizzling, and the next, that magnificent erection decides to take a vacation, leaving you both feeling...

Picture this: you're in the heat of the moment, and suddenly, poof! The main attraction decides to call it quits. Now, you might start wondering if you're not attractive enough or if he's just not into you anymore. Meanwhile, your man is probably sitting there internally screaming, "Work, dammit, work! She's going to think I'm a lousy lover!"


And then comes the inevitable awkwardness. You try to reassure each other with a hesitant "Don't worry," but in the back of your minds, you're both silently questioning, "Is it me?" This vicious cycle can easily spiral into a barrier between you, making each subsequent encounter more fraught with anxiety.



But fear not, girls! Erectile dysfunction, or ED, is a common occurrence that can happen to any man at any stage of life. Trust me, I've had my fair share of partners who've experienced it. When I was younger and less experienced, I used to blame myself and wonder what I was doing wrong. But over the years, I've come to realise that ED is not a reflection of my attractiveness or desirability. So, what's the deal then?


Well, there are various reasons behind ED, ranging from medical issues to situational factors. On the medical front, it could be caused by neurological problems like diabetes, chronic alcoholism, smoking or multiple sclerosis. Even something as unexpected as heavy metal poisoning or nerve damage from pelvic operations can be culprits. Then, there's drug-induced ED, which can occur due to certain medications. It's always important to check with a doctor first when suffering from ED because it can have underlying medical issues.


On the other hand, situational ED might stem from psychological stress related to performance anxiety or relationship issues. For instance, your man might have no trouble getting it up during solo sessions but struggles when it comes to partnered playtime. In such cases, it's crucial to address the underlying stressors rather than focusing solely on the physical aspect.


So, what can we do to support our partners when ED rears its floppy head? Well, first and foremost, let's ditch the pressure and take a breather. If things aren't going according to plan in the bedroom, there's no harm in hitting pause and shifting gears. Whether it's going back to kissing, exploring oral sex, or simply enjoying the intimacy of a good old cuddle, remind your man that pleasure comes in many forms.


Communication is key in navigating through these choppy waters. Reassure your partner that you're in this together and that you're still attracted to them, regardless of any hiccups along the way. And please, whatever you do, don't add fuel to the fire by asking if it's because of you. Trust me, that's the last thing he needs to hear at that moment.


I've had countless conversations with my male clients about this very issue, and one common concern that arises is the fear of rejection. As women, it's easy to internalise our partner's struggles and interpret them as a reflection of our own desirability. But let's flip the script for a moment and consider how our men might be feeling. It's not a pleasant experience for them either, believe me.


So, what options are left if the issue persists? Sure, there's always the little blue pill, but do you really want to rely on that, scheduling your intimacy and sacrificing spontaneity in the process? Another common reason for this issue is stress. When it comes to the mechanics of sex, think of it like this: as arousal kicks in, blood rushes to the genitals, but under stress, it diverts elsewhere, like your hand so you are reread fight or your feet so you are reread to run and increased heart rate and now he is in fight-or-flight response. Not exactly the ideal mood for getting our freak on, right? Think about it: No one wants a bit of a how's your father when they feel threatened or in some kind of danger.



This is where a sexual hypnotherapist can step in. Now, before you start conjuring up images of swinging pendulums and mind control, let me assure you that sexual hypnotherapy is far from your typical hypnosis session. It's all about relaxation, tapping into your subconscious, and reprogramming your mindset when it comes to sex.

By helping clients relax and redirect their focus towards pleasure sensations, the hypnotherapist aims to alleviate stress and reignite passion in the bedroom.


To sum up, erectile dysfunction might throw a curveball into your sex life, but with a little patience, understanding, and a sprinkle of humour, you and your man can navigate through it together. After all, isn't overcoming obstacles what makes relationships stronger? So, chin up, smile on, and keep the love alive, one wobbly Willy at a time!


If you are considering hypnotherapy for Erection Woes or any other issue, please book a free consultation today. BOOK HERE>>





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